When I was younger, anxiety is what made me concerned the most out of it. I remember that someone conducted a few psychology tests on me about anxiety, well I could tell that it was not good. I remember how I used to have low self-esteem and letting myself down all the time, I shut myself out from people for a while, only to find that I am getting worse. It was for a while, but the aftermath of it affected me for the rest of my life, until this day. But what made me changed is that, something that sparks in depth of my heart like a tiny voice saying that I cannot be like this anymore. I realized that I need to change, I have to learn to love myself and embrace my flaws. 

You have to learn to accept your flaws and no one is perfectly perfect, even if they try to be one

Sometimes it is difficult for humans to feel free in this world. Society tries to place people into confining little boxes. We are told how we should look, think, and act. At times, there is not a lot of room to express your individuality, your unique self. People who are different tend to face a lot of rejection, and try hard to fit in the crowd. They are ostracized and are told that they are not worthy of love. Here is the thing, do not mind of what they would say, you may find it hard to get it from your head but just be yourself. Embrace yourself more, give yourself of what you deserve, and love.

I used to be those kids who tried so hard to fit in the crowd, but then I thought that all of that was not worth it, I feel like I did something wrong to myself. If the so-called introvert yet mysterious me is what the perception is like to people, then be it like that. Perception and impression are always in contrast but yet are the same thing. You will never know a person until you really get to know them.  

Every individual has something unique and interesting to add to the world. My grandma used to say this when I was younger as if I remember it, do not ever question your existence into this world, you are created because you have a purpose to be fulfilled here, and be a decent human being.

Do not be afraid to let your true self shine through. Eventually most people will learn to love you. The ones who do not simply are not worth your time. If you ever start to feel trapped, just remember that the butterfly. No matter how many times you try to catch a butterfly, it will always find a way to break free.

I can say that I changed for the better now though sometimes I kept getting a flashback of how I used to be in that time, carefully thinking that I will not let it happen again, ever.

With love, Syafika